My husband and I were just talking about everything that’s in the news today. It is an overload on the brain. It used to be when we got married over 24 years ago I worried about everything! Keeping a roof and food to 3, trying to work to make the bills. I failed epically but that’s another post. ￼
Yet, somehow I’ve made peace with the coronavirus as a threat. I hope to never catch it. I’m doing what I can to prevent it!. Maybe it is because I feel secure. Being married as long as we have makes me feel secure and loved. I am not alone.
All I can do is keep myself away by sheltering in my own safe home. There’s just two of us. I’ve got someone by my side to shelter beside.
Today were using Target pick up. Rather than going inside getting the items. I have my prescriptions (and all health care items) mailed to me. Other items sent to me; UPS, USPS, FEDEX. When they arrive any outer packaging is removed before entering my home. We have a system of wiping or spraying with Lysol.￼￼ Some item bought in bulk are left outside for the required time for the Lysol to work ……or the virus to die by leaving it on the porch longer. It is not a heated porch.
Books! I’ve just barely begun Testaments by Margaret Atwood. I can’t wait to read her other works. All on Kindle on an IPad of coarse!
It is April! My garden starting month. I’ve already planted a batch of arugula in the greenhouse. My fickle strawberries need transplanting. The greenhouse always needs a cleaning.
My health is fickle. It all depends upon my oxygen saturation. Above 94 seems to be magical. Below I’m left exhausted without purpose.
I cannot change this. I can only adapt to what is NOW. We used face masks, social distancing. Hand washing has always been important to us, even more now.
I have made peace with what the coronavirus virus is. I have made peace with the possibility of being in an ICU bed desperately wanting oxygen…..without a ventilator. I’m too old, sick or any other reason. I have been there. I was on the edge of falling back into a big black vast entry point. I was going away. There was not a bright light. I had a choice to re-inflate my lung. It was an odd device to blow into. The confusion and delirium from lack of oxygen, kept inhaling from the device, not blowing in. It was all I could do. I survived.
I’m here in my newly renovated kitchen making bread from scratch on the butcher block counters I have always dreamed of. Life gives only what you are strong enough to accept. I’ve made peace with this plague. It will never enter my territory. Chuck is home. We are safe.
It is all good. I taught him to sew, together we are making masks to give to others.
Twenty four years is a very long time to spend with someone. Time can test. Time often takes a toll. This day in time during a pandemic from the Coronavirus we didn’t have to think about anything. We are working together for better or worse. On the flip side when we emerge there will be story to be told I’m sure.