Twenty years ago I was in the emergency room with a full fledged panic attack. Subsequent er visits, labs, multiple doctors and finally a diagnosis. (Rheumatoid Athritis later changed to arthritis caused by Hereditary Hemochromatosis.) Another diagnosis ( Fibromyalgia with Chronic Fatigue) followed by a more recent diagnosis. (Graves Disease; hypothyroid with treatment has become hyperthyroid). Add 3 surgeries for breast cancer, a very painful liver biopsy and 2 procedures to reduce lower back pain. Yet I was judged by the one person I truly believed educated.
Last night had a dream I was speaking to my Dad. It was a replay of the last conversation he and I had days before he passed away. He said “You are my wiser daughter. Your Mother and I judged you too soon.”
In reality he sharing he had recieved a visit from my daughters boyfriend’s mother, Mary. Mary had visited my Dad several weeks before. She acknowledged she abused financially by the pair until her bank account was literally empty. Dad also admitted he had known for years my ex-husband (in Dads words) ‘had a screw loose.’ He said he feared my daughter had gotten the genetics because of the way she systematically stole money from a woman that placed trust in her. He apologized to me for having judged me without knowing all the facts. For years he blindly trusted my daughters lies.
It wasn’t what I wanted to hear. It wasn’t what I wanted to live through especially while battling a life threatening illness. It did give me validation.